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Bursting Your Bubble When Your Child Does Not Want a Bath

Lots of little kids never want to take a bath! They don’t cooperate and it becomes a battle of wills. Here are some tips if you have a little bath-avoider!

Think about it

Take a minute to stop and think about why your child doesn’t want to take a bath. Is it because she’s having too much fun doing other things and doesn’t want to stop? Is it because bath time usually includes a battle of wills? Is it because she always gets soap in her eyes? Or is it because it signals the beginning of the bedtime routine? Once you figure out the real reason, you can take steps to move past the problem.

Things you can do

Make it fun. Allow your child to use bubble bath or kid’s bath foam or soap crayons to make it more fun. Buy a few fun bath toys, or use plastic kitchen products for play. Allow your child to play for a while before washing up - and a little bit afterward too. Starting and ending on a fun note will set you up for success tomorrow.

Control the suds. Even one incident of soap-in-the-eyes can make a child edgy. If your child fears getting soap in her eyes when you wash her hair, let her wear swimming goggles or a plastic sun visor while you wash her hair.

Be very consistent. Have a bath every day, or every other day, at exactly the same time, and in the same way. Specific routines can overcome resistance after they’ve become regular occurrences.

Give a forewarning. Let your child know ahead of time that bath time is nearing. Give a few warnings, “Bath time in 10 minutes.” Then, “Bath time in 5 minutes.” Your child will respond better than if you just drop the bomb in the middle of his fun activity.

Change your routine. Bath time is often done at bedtime when a child and the parent are tired and grumpy. In addition, if your child knows that bedtime follows a bath, he may want to put off the entire sequence. Instead, consider letting your child bathe first thing in the morning when everyone is fresh and energetic.

If your child is old enough… consider skipping the bath and changing to a shower!

What not to do

Don’t lecture about the importance of personal hygiene. Hygiene isn’t the reason your child avoids the bath - she isn’t even thinking about that aspect of bathing. It’s the time that it takes and the process involved that she objects to.

Don’t wheel and deal. Parents inadvertently get into the practice of bargaining with their child: “If you get in the bath right now, then I’ll let you have bubbles.” Bribes are the wrong approach to gaining cooperation, and take power away from the parent and give it to the child. Bribes are different from rewards or encouragement. Bubbles offered to a child up front, to make the bath more fun, are fine. Bubbles offered later, to stop a tantrum, could be seen as a reward for misbehavior or as incentive for future tantrums.

Don’t make it a battle. It’s just a bath, mom and dad. Take a breath and relax. In a few months, this will pass and you’ll be on to the next parenting challenge - and, yep, there is always one of those.

Elizabeth is a mother of four, and author of the bestselling  No-Cry Solution series on topics such as sleep, discipline, picky eating and potty training. She is known worldwide as the voice of practical, respectful parenting. Visit her blog at www.elizabethpantley.com.

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