Today’s lifestyle can be very hectic, full of duties and interruptions for many children. Still, parents are worried that they are not creating enough activities or experiences for their children. Based on my experience, there is an increasing amount of child-related issues around restlessness and finding it more difficult to calm down and concentrate. They are often bombarded by schedules, activities, hobbies, noises and overstimulation. I often recommend to do less and ‘just be’ more.
Children need peace and rest, which helps growing bodies, recharges the brain and soothes still-developing nervous systems. Downtime will also balance their emotions, irritability and help them to focus. Quiet moments or boredom can be the growing place for creativity and free play. Creativity will increase your child’s resourcefulness that will help them later on in life.
How to cherish peace? For adults, it is very important to remember that most behaviors are learned - children role-model adults in their behaviors and attitudes. It is good to check your own attitude toward quiet moments. Are you able to just relax and ‘be’? Your child will adopt the rhythm from the environment they live in. Make sure you also create slow rhythms around your home and in your life.
Create a peaceful home. Reduce the activity and noise around your child. Switch off the TV, radio, tablet and video games. Sit down on the floor with your child or just lie down together to relax. You can also choose a quiet activity for your child like modeling clay or piecing together a puzzle. It is good to have quiet moments every day.
Go into nature. Go to a forest or green space as often as you can – daily, if possible. Nature has an amazing therapeutic effect on our well-being. A walk in a forest or in a park will soothe the nerves, lower blood pressure and calm a racing heart. It also provides endless inspiration for the creativity of your child. You can collect little nature treasures, like rocks and sticks, or lie down on a blanket and watch different shaped clouds float by…
Quiet hour. This is also a real rescue for parents that desperately need that little break from the children’s never ending go-go mode. Introduce a quiet hour as part of your weekend routine. For example, after lunch is a great time for that. Everyone grabs their own book, cuddles under a blanket and follows the rule: No talking for an hour. Bliss!
Family massage moment. Touch has a very calming impact. You can play some relaxation music in the background. Throw all the cushions on the floor, lie down and each family member will get a pair of feet to work on. We call this a ‘massage circle’ in our home. Teach your children to touch gently with calming strokes. For younger ones, you can give individual massage with a little storytelling. Maybe you paint their back with an imaginary brush and relaxing blue magic paint.
‘Peace corner.’ Children love a place where they can rest and recover from overstimulation. Create a peace corner together with your child. Find a quiet spot in your home and get creative! A peace corner might have some cushions on the floor, soft lighting and drapery that create a safe cocoon feeling. There might be some books or a basket of little rocks, shells, cotton balls and cards with calming pictures. Avoid stuff overload and carefully chose some peace-promoting items. Tell your child that this is a peace corner where they can choose to go when they want to have quiet time. If someone is in the peace corner, we do not disturb anyone. We let them be. Use of the peace corner is always voluntary.
It is very important that we teach children the art of just being and bring the peace back into our daily lives. We also need to change the collective thinking that quiet time is seen as boring or unproductive instead of recharging and balancing. After children become familiar with some of these peace practices, they will start to use them without constant direction from adults. They first need someone to show them the way! Peaceful moments to every home!
Carita Viklund is a Finnish Family Therapist. She works with children and families by providing them with practical tools to support their mental and emotional well-being.
Calgary’s Child Magazine © 2024 Calgary’s Child
